Friday, December 8

Why Flylady and I can never be friends

Friendly aquaintances, yes. Friends? No.

Flylady is a great website for most women who enjoy keeping an orderly home and developing routines that keep things running smoothly.

Sure. If you like that sort of thing.

But I ask you....where's the sense of adventure? the thrill? The satisfaction in having everything done so easily?

Flylady's method has you rotate areas of your home so that every place in your house gradually gets tackled and cleaned inside out. Wimps. My method sets aside a "junk drawer" area, not to be touched for at least a month. It might be a coat closet, a pantry, or even a whole bedroom. This is where those careless items rest and build, simmering ominously while you obliviously add to the beast each time you fail to put things back "where they belong." Advanced users of my method can even maintain more than one of these areas, but it's not for the faint of heart.

Flylady's method requires 15 minutes of work in your designated zone each day. Namby Pambies. (I hope that means what I think it means.) My method leaves your zone alone for at least a month...until it requires 4 hours of sweating, crying, and maybe even a little swearing. But once finished, you will know that you have fought and you have conquered.

This morning, I couldn't see the top of that dryer. I had to re-stack the toppling items from the dryer-top in order to lift the washer lid. I had to push things out of the way to open the dryer door. But now look at it. Now THAT is housecleaning people. Housecleaning for the stalwart soul.

*This method has not been tested on normal humans. If you, or anyone in your household, is prone to allergies, food poisoning, or anxiety do not attempt this method without the consent and direct supervision of your doctor.

13 comments:

granny janny said...

I think you should get a job writing for the paper or something. You are so creative. I'm proud of your accomplishments.

Christy said...

You are hilarious. I needed that laugh this morning...

I am glad there is some one else out there that has my cleaning philosophy LOL

Christy

Jessica said...

that fly lady is a wuss--i like your way better. i already practice that...we're like one mind!

The MaMa said...

Jenn, your just too funny!!!

Jennifer said...

Yep, I practice your way too. I tried Flylady and I spent all my cleaning time cleaning out my email box from all her annoying reminders! The only reminder I need is the junk piles getting out of control around my house, lol!

C.A. Worcester said...

I know this is kind of late, but as I was reading about your fly lady comments and LEAVING your mess for a while to simmer - I thought......"compost pile". hee hee. Let's call it "Compost Cleaning"!!!

Jenn said...

Compost Cleaning! HA! I love it!

ben said...

Jenn you are so funny

comfortablydomestic.com said...

Great minds must think alike, because yours is the *exact* method that I practice in my house. I did try fly lady 2 kids ago, and the whole thing stressed me out. That, and I couldn't get into the whole idea of buying a clean pair of shoes to wear only in the house, and all day long.

Autumn said...

I LOVE this! And, I love the FlyLady! I was doing such a great job flying and then my shoes started hurting my feet. Really!
I am right there with you!

Lisa Grace said...

Ahahahaha ... I *love* it! I'm a FlyLady-ish person ... I do try, but I end up going your route. Now I will see that as mountains conquered instead of routines delayed ;)

Cara said...

Wow...I think we must have been seperated at birth!

April said...

Yessss. That's my bedroom right now. Actually that's my bedroom pretty much always except for the once or twice a year that I just have to defunk it. But then just like you said, it is so clean and sparkly for a day.

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