Thursday, April 19

I am destined to receive it

Why should I receive this Major Award award, you ask?

Because I actually shot my eye out! Now, how many can lay claim to that? But oh, yes, I experienced a tragic childhood accident with my Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle and lost my left eye.

Okay, maybe it wasn't a rifle. Maybe it was a freak accident with a sliver of metal in a shop building, but bullets are made of metal (I think) and that's close, right?

My eye was replaced with a glass eye. A really realistic looking glass eye. Which would be great if my eyes were brown. Or blue. Or green. But they're hazel! This means they aren't the same color from day to day. Bummer about painted just can't convince it to change colors! But even with funky hazel green & brown, the guys who made this eye matched it so well, it almost seems to change colors anyway. My trick is to show as much cleavage as possible so no one notices my eyes.

(Kidding! It was a joke, mom!)

Now, wouldn't you agree it was meant for me? Come on, give the one-eyed girl an award!

Wait, come to think of it, an award for a blog entitled "White Trash Mama" because of a lesson God was teaching me about NOT caring about other people's opinions of me does seem a little wrong. "I don't care what people think!" right beside the plea: "Like me! And prove it with an award!" Hmmmm....actually, yeah, that does sound just like me.

Yeah, mind power, Swede; mind power


Jenn said...

Mom, I'm kidding about the cleavage.

Christy said...

LOL You are so dang funny.

Congrats on the award!!!

andie said...

LOL! I got the award, too!

I claimed mind power, also, but really it was mostly whining.

The Wooden Porch said...

That award is a hoot! I'm planning on signing up too. :-)

Jenn said...

Oops - I need to edit the title so it doesn't sound like I already received it. I just WANT it. Did you already win, Andie?

Nan said...

Whoa! You are the only one who has gone to the lengths of body part removal to win this award. I'd say that considering the amount of time it's been since the shop incident and now... it's about TIME you finally got an award for your troubles!

(And really... I am sorry about your eye! But it sounds like you have made peace with it.)

Go back to my place, hit "e-mail me," Demand your prize and it will be delivered to you in the form of a code post-haste!

JennaG said...

Enjoyed my visit today--so glad you got this prestigious award. I'm from Missouri too!

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