Friday, May 29

It's after 11:00 pm

and two of my babies are still awake. They found out today that we'll be putting our dog down tomorrow. We've had Sunni for 9 years and she's been hurting with arthritis for over a year now. We've discussed it with them several times, but it was still hard for the kids to hear it was actually time.

We talked about it as we were tucking into bed and Honor started crying a tiny whimpering cry. It was different than any I'd heard her make before. Joel soon joined her. They cried and cuddled with me for a while. They reminisced and talked for a while. Then they cried some more. Honor told me, "I didn't know you were going to TALK about it tonight! And then these tears just POP started coming and won't stop!" She was confused about her body behaving so unpredictably.

They both decided to stay up and cuddle with Sunni while the other two went on to bed. I left to do laundry and expected to soon find two kiddos curled up asleep next to their pup. Nope. The tears had started again. I scooped Honor up and she began bawling. Her eyes were almost panicked, still utterly confused by the foreign crying spasm. She said, "I don't understand! I keep trying to make it stop, but it just won't! I just love our Sunni. I've lost people before, but never family in my own house!"

She was so tired and admitted it, but couldn't sleep because of the tears. Joel saved the day with a snack of peanut butter spoons (her favorite) and a glass of water. She licked the spoon clean and started talking out of her head from lack of sleep about how peanut butter was like paint...."except they taste different."


"No, I never ate paint, but it's like my mouth is the wall and the peanut butter is the paint!"

After the snack, she gave a contented sigh and said she could now sleep. Joel, the sweetheart, carried her to his bed so she wouldn't sleep alone tonight.

I have to be honest, Sunni's leaving tomorrow doesn't affect me at all like it has them, though it makes me feel cold-hearted to admit it. But my heart is breaking for my babies going through something so new and so hard. Joel said it well though: "Even knowing we'd have to say goodbye like this, it's been worth it to have all these good memories."


Jenni said...

I'm so sorry about Sunni, Jenn! I know how hard it is even if you don't feel as attached (or even if you don't particularly like the pesky critter) to see your kids go through that and watch their little hearts break. What a wise boy you have there! And such sweet, tender children all around. Give them all an extra hug for me.

Lawanda said...

I understand. We just lost a pet, and Faithy reacted very similarly. It is so hard.

I am so sorry for your loss :(

Jessica said...

i'm so sorry for sunni and for your babies. roscoe was our baby before we had babies and even though my time with him is very limited now (due to the human babies we now have ) i would be sad to see him go.

not as much as dan or luke i'm afraid. :(

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